Donald, this is from me to you…

They’re everywhere, man. But only you can see them. It’s a parallel world. And it’s not just the spooks. It’s the journalists too. They’ve got those devices. They can listen in to all your conversations through the mic inside your TV or your PC. Trust no one ! And be thankful to Wikileaks (once more)…

Take me, for instance : the other day, I farted while writing an online application for some stupid job. The next day, my favorite talk show host dedicated his monologue to fat people farting. Can you believe it ? Then he winked while looking straight at me through the camera. Coincidence ?

Another one : I’ve had this beef with Nicole lately. It’s well documented. And there’s, like, this closet at my grandma’s house containing objects from my childhood, as well as my teenage and college years. I’ve never mentioned it to anyone. Among those is a book I was very fond of as a kid. It’s called « Rox & Rooky« . It’s about the adventures of a fox and his canine friend. Well now, believe it or not : one day, a few months ago, I tuned in to this morning show I sometimes listen to. There’s an imitator in it. Quite talented but very bitchy. Didn’t he find a way to fucking mention that fucking book everyone else must have forgotten by now ?! He did it twice, the motherfucker, in case I hadn’t heard it the first time !!! Coincidence ?

Those people invite themselves into your living room, man, your oval office, your hotel, your beach resort, or whatever, depending on your lifestyle. Literally. And if you move, they move with you. They’ve got spies all over the place. They pay your friends and relatives to gather confidential stuff about you, which they then distillate in their shows for your ears only to make you feel uncomfortable. And you don’t know them. You’ve never met them. But they seem to know you. They know no boundaries whatsoever, and they don’t have the slightest dignity. A new form of GesTaPo unlike any of its predecessors, I’m telling you. The enemy of the people, man. True that ! There’s no other way of putting it…

A few years ago, I went to this gay spa, where I sucked some huge black cock. The guy looked a lot like Devon Lebron, but with an even bigger dick and a set of impressive low hangers. The next day, Omar Sy (you know, from “X-Men, Apocalypse”) appeared on TV denying his alleged homosexuality. And the list goes on, and on and on : no place to hide… Sometimes, like Pink Floyd, I feel like singing “What Do You Want From Me ?”. Because they’re clearly expecting something, goddammit !!! But what good would that do ?

I also had this shady deal with some corrupt notary public of Russian descent. It’s been going on for over two years now. The guy owes me two million bucks in exchange for a few kilos of coke and some stolen goods. Refuses to pay. That’s because he knows I’m being watched, and all my contacts with me ! I mean, I can’t even kidnap him and remove one or two of his fingernails. Do you fucking realize what this is doing to my street rep ?!

So, I’m with you on this, buddy. Hang in there ! And don’t utter a word… cause they’re around, believe me !

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