being told by one’s schizophrenic mother being gay is a psychiatric illness;
being instantaneously fired with prejudice without even being asked one’s side of the story, after an early-morning altercation with the driver of a Porsche parked on the sidewalk who got angry because one’s vehicle didn’t stop when His Majesty decided to re-enter traffic;
being purposefully left to freeze in one’s rented apartment for an entire winter because the apartment’s boiler was kaput and the landlord would do nothing about it;
the unilateral withdrawal of one’s attorney from a case after he claimed the provision paid to him in accordance with a fully certified legal document wasn’t high enough;
the local Bar endorsing the attorney’s withdrawal and refusing to abide by the conditions it had set out in its own legal documents;
the local Bar being sentenced in abstentia to abide by those conditions in first instance, yet appealing that decision after being incomprehensibly absent at the hearing;
four other attorneys, all appointed by the local Bar, consecutively withdrawing from the case because they felt they were unable to do anything about it;
a pseudo-judge, after having issued an interlocutory injunction only to allow the (powerful) landlord to settle the dispute, closing the case unilaterally despite having been duly informed one had no attorney and was in the process of getting a new one appointed;
being physically beaten (a second time), this time for political purposes and because of one’s sexual preference (kissing a black guy in a park);
one’s concrete efforts to find a new professional activity (and, incidentally, one’s very survival) being repeatedly thwarted by delayed payments of one’s so-called benefits (nearly two months, in one particular instance, which happened to comprise the New Year holiday period), and one being subsequently forced to abandon an internship abroad for which one had at long last been selected, after years of unemployment;
being offered jobs as a street sweeper or for other functions without the slightest relation to one’s experience or interests;
being purposefully forced to inhale harmful volatile chemical substances in quasi-industrial quantities, originating from a neighboring apartment, 24 hours a day, for a year and a half (until December of 2015), as acknowledged three times by the police, with sleep deprivation and an anaphylactic shock as a result;
being informed one’s father has passed away, four months after his passing;
being constantly bullied by mean idiotic neighbors, including through the repeated sabotage of utilities;
being sued by a public-utility company for the sabotage caused by one of said neighbors, noticed the day of one’s fucking birthday (because the door of the utility room had been left wide open while it’s supposed to be locked);
being forced to do the attorney’s job and write one’s own conclusions since the clumsy yet arrogant bastard is only in it for the cash;
being announced, two weeks after that same birthday, that, following one’s grandmother’s admission into a nursing home, her own home, in which one had spent one’s entire childhood, was being sold and had already been emptied (despite provisions to the contrary in her last known will and testament, agreed to by all parties years before, which was a scam from the very beginning);
never receiving any single answer to one’s written proposal to move to her house and continue paying rent to help support the cost;
being prohibited by one’s mother’s attorney from seeing one’s grandmother ever again (as attested by a previous post), after having talked to her for about four hours right after her admission and having left her in good terms;
a mother who had been informed of one’s father passing six months before and who, on that occasion, had also been made aware of the bullying resulting in sleep deprivation, a mother who, for decades, never having had to pay one single rent in her entire life, lived for free in her parents’ second house, then sold that house and used the money to buy a comfy apartment, yet had the audacity to say : “It’s already something, isn’t it ?” (« C’est déjà ça de pris. »), a mother whose word is worth shit;
one’s tyrannical mother calling the cops on her son after feeling threatened because the latter had dared verbally express his anger over that entire situation, in which his mere involvement was never ever solicited;
one’s belongings of sentimental, educational or artistic value (for instance, a painting received as a gift for having organized an art exhibition during one’s college years) being offered to others behind one’s back as if one were already dead;
the constant determination of one’s life by others, in a feudal way, without one even being invited to the table;
the primitive people, ignorant of karma, who, while hiding from the light, always attempt to take advantage of one for merely stating these things, the same who would piss their pants (or blow themselves up ?) if they had to endure half of it, while being estranged from nearly everyone;
the manipulative interferences of “the society of the spectacle” one has to endure all along, and the feeling one gets one is living in some sort of tragic Truman Show, hence one’s ever more absurd take on things;
the way most people look at one and judge one by one’s looks, before one is even able to say a single word;
nearly every institution trampling upon one’s rights, and individuals coordinating to corner one, using the respective codes of conduct supposed to rule their activities as toilet paper;
being addressed as a robot in a robotic manner in every single interaction, sometimes as a piece of garbage, including by those who are supposed / paid to defend one’s interests;
being sued by another landlord following the flooding of his apartment, in which one bears no responsibility whatsoever, despite never being late in paying any rent for the past ten years;
having to discover, out of the blue, that one’s grandmother had died three years earlier (a mere ten months after she had been admitted into the aforementioned nursing home, on a busy city boulevard, while having always lived in the country), and that no one had had the basic decency to inform the scapegoat;
having to learn the next day, during the hearing, that the opposing counsel had contacted one’s mother, standing as irrevocable collateral security for the rental agreement, who, while also standing on top of her accumulated inherited wealth, had basically told them she didn’t give a damn, whether one was guilty or not, even at the eve of an unprecedented financial crisis;
being sentenced by the aforementioned bitch judge, all too eager to take his revenge, without any of the concrete evidence one had presented being taken into account while the opposing party had presented no evidence at all, and through a non-motivated verdict (which is illegal);
all the things not mentioned here for lack of space;
anything yet to come;
Whatever the guise of the stick, when, because of years and years and years of undue procedure (summarized here in a few sentences), one is not allowed to live one’s own life, even when the central principle of that life is to not cause others any concrete harm, leaving one to wonder why it should matter to live at all, when the (documented) harassment is permanent and, despite all the evidence, no one will either acknowledge it or put an end to it, when one realizes civilization is but an illusion, concrete commitment has no value and sadism is everywhere, in other words, when there is but the stick, and one is as tired of it as one is of fighting it, since it never stops and it always takes yet another form, one can indeed be considered by some to be responsible for no longer fighting back, but that’s where one’s (secondary) responsibility stops, and it will never erase the blatant primary responsibility of the mean primitive bitches (from whatever gender) who’ve been holding the stick all along, and who keep “pushing” and “pushing”, relentlessly, to the precipice…
Fuck the barcode 297.1 (F22) “persecutory type” ! Fuck the ignorant who blame cannabis ! And fuck those who are used to being served everything on a silver platter and think this is whining or self-pity ! This is “lived experience”, bitches ! At least, for now…
Yannick Baele 
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